Edith's Story
My name is Edith and this is my story.
I was born in Jamaica in the late 50’s but by the time I was a teenager I had lived in England and then America. Those years were unhappy times filled with abuse and sexual assault. In my later years I started to hear voices and worse still I started having these sensations that someone was touching me – I felt each muscle being prodded and poked and the voices in my head wouldn’t stop. It was the worst feeling in the world. I felt totally alone. As the years passed I managed to get by. I didn’t know I had a mental illness, I just knew that my mind wouldn’t switch off and there was nothing I could do about it.
When I moved to America, where I went to college and later to work I was able to make a good living, but then feelings of anxiety triggered my depression and the voices. I couldn’t sleep, my mind and body was not my own. I became very paranoid and kept thinking that I would be raped again. I even thought that people on TV were talking to me. This is the first time I went to get help. My doctor prescribed Valium for my anxiety but didn’t acknowledge my other symptoms. It didn’t help. Instead I started to lose jobs and at my most vulnerable point I took an overdose and tried to end my life twice.
After many terrible years, many of those being homeless, my luck finally changed when I was at Columbia University Shelter – they told me about a Clubhouse here in New York, they suggested I visit them as the shelter only operated through the night and I needed somewhere to go during the day.
I remember the day in 1992 so clearly, I walked into the beautiful building that had a spiral staircase and huge chandeliers, and people were smiling! A wonderful lady in housing called Bonnie Beam took one look at me and said – you’re not going back to the shelter, we have a room for you. This was the day that my life began. They helped me find my own apartment and introduced me to the program. I would come in 5 days a week. My old life started to diminish – it didn’t matter anymore because people here loved me. I got support and developed relationships. I even started going out to work again! A brand new life had begun.
The program saved my life over and over again. They are my family, friends and now my employer. I am proud to tell you that I am now a staff worker at an Accredited Clubhouse. I hope my story has helped you to understand that I am among millions of people living with mental illness and I am just one example of the thousands of lives that are being changed here at Clubhouse International. I was living in darkness for many years. I started experiencing the light when Clubhouse International opened its doors for me.